Is that death I smell on you? Or mud? Or shit? Ah Spring!!

Spring is springing here in BFE, Indiana. There is nothing quite like being distracted from stacks of work, cleaning, laundry, and cooking like a sunshine and blue skies! Ahhh! Soon, I'll get my shit together and go hang my beloved hammock in the trees. But it's heavy, and rain seems to always be in "tomorrow's" forecast when I want to hang it. Maybe I'll just go to bed instead.

I have some landscaping that I've decided I'm going to add to my "To Do" (but probably won't get done) list this year. I'd like to spruce up the view from the home office window. Right now, I have a bright, shiny view of a transformer and electric box. Oh and a huge puddle just beside that when it rains (which, come to think of it) probably isn't a terrific thing in and of itself.

When daydreaming out my office window, I can also see my older dog laying/sleeping/rolling/drinking said puddle.

The younger dog knows better.
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Much better
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She rolls on dead things and eats shit instead.
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You know - like a normal dog.
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And then licks the inside of my child's mouth.
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Fantastic.

Happy Monday, Ladies. Sorry this is a short post.

Personal circumstances leave me a bit less than inspired as of late. Hopefully the coming days will inspire more entertaining entries.

Hello, Old Friend - I can't say that I've missed you...

The introduction of solid food to our baby has meant a few changes to this family:
1- Feed time can no longer happen anywhere, and is no longer something I can semi-multitask through. Cleanup's a bitch.
2- Birth control changed. I was on a pill-lite while I was full-time breastfeeding, but now I'm on full power birth control again. I prefer Nuva-Ring for the simple fact that I'm an asshole and can't remember to take anything at the same time every day.
3- My cycle is back. Whoopie!!

During my pregnancy, I was on a relatively even keel. Granted, that even keel was more emotional than the average within my normal roller coaster of emotion, but it was even. Once the baby came - all bets were off. I made no promises with moods, but even through colic I was able to pacify the demon bitch that lurks within my being with the cute baby-ness that had entered our lives.

I suppose that is over now. I've been set off by the dogs barking, comments on social sites, and of course the husband not being able to read my mind - that I had changed three times since we last spoke.

Red Flag: PMS. Damn.

I've never been really bad - like screaming and crying and throwing things bad. Well, at least consistently. I just get pissed off at stupid things and boil over at something utterly ridiculous. To top it off - while I'm spouting my frustration with the fact that humans should be able to consume food without making a single sound...I have the out-of-body experience that shows me Ebeneezer Scrooge style that I'm being an ass. I still can't stop. Ugh - I was enjoying not having to apologize for being an utter bitch.

That said...

We all have our days when it all piles up and the ones closest to us bear the brunt. That sucks - but that isn't unique to the females. Men do it, too -- and THAT, my friends, comes with no warning, and can't be marked on a calendar.

Ever.

So there.

It just takes a moment to put it all into perspective

I am busy as hell. With each passing day, more dishes accumulate in the sink - or dog fur on the floor - or dusk on the tv. Well, the dust gets taken care of now, but just with random socks - and no one ever gets the corners.

I feel as though I'm falling behind in all aspects - no longer above water, but just a couple inches below. Survival is just within my grasp, but the more I frantically reach, the deeper I slip.

This is my life. The life of a momma, a step-mom, a wife, a sister, a daughter, a granddaughter, a niece, a dog owner, a home owner, a friend, an employee, a facebook addict, a car driver, a tax payer, a blogger, and a woman. It is exhausting. I've become borderline narcoleptic - sleeping in the five or ten minute increments that I'm afforded.

Oh, but it is worth it - my friends. I can sit pissing time away day after day watching my little one as she grows. She is why I have fallen behind in life - but she is also why the rest of that no longer matters. Bills will get paid, and laundry will get done.

I will likely allot the next five minutes to watch her reach, and reach, and reach for a toy - and then squeal with her when she finally gets it.

Because she does get it. It's about the triumphs in life - her 5 1/2 months have shown her no failure, but just things for which she needs to continue reaching -- even if you land square on your face trying.

I'll continue to reach in all directions, but I'll be sure - come hell or high water - that her direction is the one from which I never stray.

Happy Monday, everyone.

I may die of not one, but two bad food consumption incidents tonight

As I am sure is the case with many of my readers - the easier the dinner, the better. Since I don't have a child to try and coax into eating a specific food group - my menu creativity is allowed to wane for now. Tonight I wanted chili. It has been a cool day, and the ease of opening a few cans and turning on the stove sounded good to me.

Chili in some corners of the nation is held in the realm of religion. Pasta, never pasta. Beans, never beans. Meat ground, chopped or omitted. Essentially, the only common factor in chili nationwide is the chili powder and tomato product as its base. Here in the Midwest, chili varies from family to family like meatloaf and homemade mac n' cheese. Running with an outdoorsy crowd, serving chili is perfectly acceptable because the after dinner campfire hangout provides an appropriate setting for post-chili release. (Did she just make a reference to farting? - Yes. Yes I did.) Plus, chili made over a campfire is fantastic - but the cleanup is a bitch.

Anyway, I have had the fortune of having several families versions of chili since I've been out on my own. I have seen the different applications of ingredients to arm myself with the ability to make chili with almost anything in the cabinet - so long as one item is chili powder and I have a tomotoey base.

Other factors that play into my preparation:

• Availability: If I don't have something, it's obviously not going into the chili. Since I have a chest freezer full of venison this time of year - we normally end up with a meaty chili. I usually ensure that I have the chili beans, kidney beans, tomato sauce or paste, and diced tomatoes stocked in the pantry.
  
• Heat: My husband prefers to cry at every meal by slathering everything in peppers, hot sauces, and other torture devices. I have a more sensitive palette and with breastfeeding I have to be careful, but I try to compromise. I put in enough spice to push the mix beyond a beany spaghetti sauce, but not so much that it burns my eyes as it simmers. If my husband is making the meal, a mix of the following required coolants are required: cheese, sour cream, sugar. The combination of all three are preferred.
• End game: What are the plans for the next 24 hours? Will we be sitting at a wedding, hiking single file, crammed into a family gathering, or working solo in the office or hanging on the couch? How available will a bathroom be? Seriously, if you don't worry about that stuff - you're either "that guy" fogging up the room and blaming the dog or you live a very secluded life. I'm just one foot inside of the mountain cave and I still take it into consideration.
• Time: Finally, the end-all, be-all limiting factor. Do I have time to cook peppers and meat before adding to the pot? Usually no. I cook during nap time. If I add steps, I reduce the likelihood of being able to enjoy my creation before bedtime.

Tonight's chili:
Chili ready diced tomatoes, chili beans, kidney beans, tomato sauce. No time for meat. I like to serve my chili on top of pasta as to not risk bloaty-pasta chili in subsequent bowls. Of course, the queen of pasta hoarding had depleted her stash of three dimensional pasta. (I apparently can make spaghetti until the cows come home.) I ended up breaking lasagna noodles into bite-sized pieces. I added shredded cheese and sour cream (which may have been past its prime - so hard to tell with a dairy product already marketed as sour...no mold, so we're good to go). It wasn't great, but not bad either. I'm sure my husband will dump a load of chili powder into the mix when he tastes it - rendering the remainder too hot for me to handle...

I know you are all jealous of my culinary prowess.

Oh. Icing on the cake: I was inspired to make chili by the corn bread on the counter that was no less than three weeks old, but covered securely with foil. I had already cracked my can of chili beans before noticing (while chewing a nibblet of the bread) that white mold had begun to grow on the top.

Sonofabitch.

You can keep your moldy bread, unless it tastes like bubblegum...

I'm not a huge fan of antibiotics. There. I said it. I know that the world as we know it today - with the population levels we sustain and need to feed - simply would crumble without this technology. I just believe that today's doctors lean a bit heavily on these - signing over Z-packs over the phone to "heal" a person's self-diagnosis. This abuse is simply going to FORCE everyone into stronger and stronger antibiotic requirements - and those that cannot afford to be treated or go undiagnosed will succumb to a superbug that cannot be fought by the body's natural immune system alone.

Am I a bit paranoid? Maybe. Do I think our nation's overuse of medicine to solve problems is money driven? Absolutely. Do I have a medical education and are my opinions grounded in medical fact? No.

Proceed at your own risk of reading an opinion...

I'm an ecologist. Simply put - nature has a balance - if you screw with that balance - everyone's screwed.

I have two specific instances that give me pause when I'm prescribed antibiotics - to the point were I will hold a fresh prescription bottle in my hand and wonder if I should actually go through with the treatment. Of course, as directed, if I start an antibiotic I always finish it.

The following are observations I have made in relation to antibiotics that the docs and pharmacists have failed to mention to me when administering the prescription.

(1) Birth control
The long and the short of this one: I know of several babies who were born 38-40 weeks after an antibiotic was prescribed. Pill babies. Women on the pill who get sick are prescribed antibiotics. The antibiotics override the system, and women get pregnant. I have ALWAYS told doctors that I'm on birth control when asked if I'm taking medication. Some have responded in a way similar to "oh, I mean real meds, sweetiepie..." fuckers. It is frustrating that I have noticed that pills fail when a women is on antibiotics - but a women is neither counseled in the doctor's office or warned on the prescription about this risk! Maybe the handful of "oops" pill babies that I know of are a coincidence...but maybe not.

(2) Good bugs v Bad bugs
Antibiotics are not discriminatory - they nuke the bodies microorganisms and can wreak havoc on the natural systems of the body. When I was in the hospital to give birth, I was given an IV of antibiotics. Many women - especially those whose water breaks before coming in - have experienced this. In addition to having this IV during labor - I had to continue on the IV for another several hours after birth because of the "reconstructive surgery" that was required... I went home with my baby and life was good. Until about a month afterward. Then shit hit the fan - and everything else. I had a crippling bought of diarrhea and vomiting. I almost lost my milk supply because I was so dehydrated. I went to the doctor (not my ob) and he said that the antibiotics that were used cleared my gut of the bad AND the good bugs, which left me a clean slate for colonization. Apparently, the bad bugs claimed me as their territory. It took a while for them to build up to a level of nasty that affected my system. He said that it is fairly common for people to experience this. He prescribed me another antibiotic to re-nuke my system - and told me to start eating yogurt with natural bacteria in it to recolonize with the good guys. Why hadn't I been told at the hospital that my digestive system had been given a run for its money and to eat yogurt to ensure a positive, non-pukey postpartum experience?

Sidebar: Of course, I went to the pharmacy to pick up the prescription he called in - and on the bottle it said - DO NOT USE IF BREASTFEEDING. What the hell? He asked me specifically if I was breastfeeding and we actually had a discussion about it. I digress...

Ok, so this rant has a lesson, ladies. Number 1 - talk to your doctor AND your pharmacist about the side effects of your antibiotics. Getting better feels like the most important thing, but taking care of a newborn that was conceived when you were religiously taking the pill while shitting your guts out is not an ideal situation. Number 2 - if you take an antibiotic - eat yogurt. It doesn't have to be the name brand - just one that has natural cultures on the label. Your colon will thank you.

Again, this is all my personal observation. Feel free to comment if you have a more informed opinion! The purpose of this post is to get you to think - and ask questions of your health care provider.

You, not they, are ultimately responsible for your well-being.

Happy St. Patrick's Day! I wish I had a more up-lifting post, but I am really concerned about his issue. :)