Murphy's Law of Co-sleeping

Since Babygirl has been sick this past week, I have been a living contradiction of having said I'd "never have my child sleep in bed with me."

Four of the last five nights.

I've come to the following conclusions about sharing my bed with a 15 month old:

• Under no circumstance is it possible to be far enough away to avoid getting kicked.
• Those kicks will either land on the head or squarely in the boob regardless of baby/parent orientation in the bed.
• The closer to dozing off you become, the farther from sleep she will be.
• She will fall asleep the moment just before you were going to shift that one last time.
• You will have a random itch, limb fall asleep, or toe cramp that results in waking her at least once before you both achieve a REM pattern.
• She has no "roll over and fall back to sleep" option, if she sees your eyes open all bets are off.
• Waking up to her gently playing with your eyelashes is much more terrifying and much less cute than it sounds.

Thank goodness she's asleep in her crib. Hopefully those glacially moving molars (three breaking through at the moment) give her (and me) a solid night's rest.